Accepting Your Artist Skills and Limitations

Just the other day as I was working through my childhood wounds around creativity, I had realized the source of my frustration and dissatisfaction with my artwork–and the source for this statement,

“It’s just not good enough.”

I had assumed expectations and responsibilities as a child to be a masterful and competent adult at, well, EVERYTHING.

Cooking, cleaning, communications, etc., I was expected to have the competencies of a 21-year-old (or any other obscure adult age) when I was only 8.

These expectations extended well beyond the chores and obligations I had at home.

Now 27, I believed I must have the skills of a 27-year-old master artist.

(Since I totally know how skillful a 27-year-old master artist needs to be as I’ve been 27 all my life. Aha, no.)

Upon reflecting on my experience as an artist, I have discovered from within my own inner creative child, who looks to be around 12 years old.

She’s accompanied with a similar artistic skill set at that age, give or take a couple of experiences as an adult in my college and professional years.

Why 12 years old?

Around that age, I was heavily encouraged NOT to indulge in any artistic activity. Thus my inner artist’s skills have been frozen at age 12.

But I have been expecting her to perform at mastery level at MY age.

It’s no wonder I have been so frustrated and heartbroken every time I’ve tried to create something new.

“I’m supposed to be as good as my age right now. As an adult. Why can’t I get these drawings done and created right away like the way they should be at my age?”

Realizing the burden and stress I’ve caused my inner artist, I’ve released this expectation from her and now meet her at HER level.

“Hello inner artist,

You are a 12-year-old artist in a 27-year-old body.”

It’s actually a very humbling experience to meet my inner creative child as she is, with limitations and experiences that are unique to her.

Now that I recognize her limitations and her capacities as an artist, I can better gauge and assign her projects that are more suitable to her capabilities as well as give her challenges that I know she can more easily accomplish. (And feel excited about!)

I’ve push her way too hard to meet certain expectations and goals when I haven’t allowed nor assisted her in developing those skills to meet them.

Hence the constant push and pause in my creative process and flow.

She pushes to create, then pauses to get the rest she needs.

And it’s usually in this pause that my adult professional side comes out and attacks her for being lazy and incapable of meeting adult responsibilities and deadlines.

It’s like expecting a person to run 10 miles their first time when they haven’t built up the muscles and stamina to run 1 mile yet.

It’s not humanly possible.

And we are human beings.

So be kind to yourself.

Go inside and find your inner creative child.

Find her and see where she is currently, in skill, experience and capacity. See her for who she truly is right now.

Has she experienced enough, seen enough, practiced enough to create that project you want her to make right now? Immediately?

If not, back track a little. Find something that would suit her level first. And slowly increase the level of difficulty suitable to her capabilities and needs.

(It’s like a video game. Select the level suitable to your current skills. Select too high and you may just want to throw your game out the window.)

It was hard for me to accept my limitations as an artist. And as a human being.

I’ve believed for so long that as long as I put my heart, mind, and soul into it, I am capable of anything.

I still believe this.

But in order to be that person I wish to be, I have to recognize and accept who I am as I am now.

By meeting myself as I am, I can better gauge what I can or can not do in this moment, work on improving skills I know I would love to have that are suitable to my current skill level, assess and enjoy the creative process allowed to me even more, and feel less frustrated with my advancement and progression as a budding artist.

I’m still internally a young artist working towards being a “professional adult” after all.

How about you?

Truly,
Tuyet

P.S. A gentle reminder that today was set to be the last day to register for my artist alley course, Artist Alley for Beginners. Because I’ve been sending reminders later in the day, I will extend the course registration date to Monday, October 8th, 2018 at 10:00 PM, so those who receive this later will have a chance to sign up.

Please note that I currently do not know if I will open this course again. Thus, if you’d appreciate organized and guided assistance for your artist alley journey from me and the 3-year experience I have as a convention artist, this will be the last known time for which I will have this course open.

Thank you again to all who have signed up so far! Your purchase not only assists you on your journey, but it allows me to pay to take care of myself as I have been precariously recovering creatively since the beginning of this year.

You can read more about it here.

From the bottom of my heart, I sincerely thank you for your support.

Healing from My Creative Injury

While flipping through one of my favorite artists’, Kelly Rae Roberts, stories on Instagram a few days ago, I came across this quote her friend  Brené Brown shared on her Instagram:

“The creative adult is the child who has survived.”  – Julian F. Fleron

This quote hit me so hard on so many levels.

Especially as I was sitting in that moment creating something special for those who have been wounded creatively.

Those who follow me on my Instagram may have seen it in my stories.

I have suffered from a creative injury as a young child, carrying this wound with me unknowingly for several years.

Now as an adult, aware and ready to face it, I am healing and nurturing this part of me, slowly but tenderly.

Not by pushing or forcing artwork out.

But by clearing the my heart so creativity may pass through.

Gently, kindly, and with love.

You may not see what I’m working on.

You may not see any outward progress.

And that’s okay.

I know I am making progress.

And I know this time is for me.

To heal the creative injuries of the past that have left me small, tortured, and traumatized for so long.

I’m taking care of me right now.

And I hope you are too.

Nurturing and saying yes to rest and to your inner creative health.

May we be the creative adults that have survived…

And have healed.

What is your take on this quote?

Truly,
Tuyet

Artist Alley for Beginners is Open Again for 3 Weeks

Artist Alley for Beginners is Open Again for 3 Weeks

Re-released with Love

I’m happy to announce that the Artist Alley for Beginners course is back up and open for registration!

I’ve been holding onto this course quietly close in my heart for a very long time now, giving it the love and acceptance it needed for me to re-release it back into the world.

I was fearful of what this course would mean to me if people didn’t receive it in a positive way. I wasn’t happy with what I’ve done, so I hid it from view.

Now I know, as long as I love it and believe in its value and beauty, that’s all that matters. <3

So it is with newfound love and acceptance that I share this course with you again, along with the rest of the world.

Along with the knowledge I gained from my years of experience in the artist alley scene and actionable suggestions, worksheets, and checklists to guide you in your artist alley preparation, this course will remind you to be true and authentic to who you are.

If this course’s mission resonates you, I welcome you to read more about it here.

And for this week only, I am offering the course at 50% off of the original price.

Next week, the price will be ~25% off original price.

And on the final week of open registration, the course will be offered at the full original price.

Course registration will close on 11:59 PM PT on October 7, 2018.

You are welcome to purchase this course whenever you like.

Thank you for your openness to this course and have a wonderful day!

Truly,
Tuyet

P.S. Here’s to loving and enjoying your artist journey all the way through. <3

Drawing AlexMax Han’s Alters | Make Something Up! (Episode 1) – Tuyet Tran

Drawing AlexMax Han’s Alters | Make Something Up! (Episode 1) – Tuyet Tran

Drawing this took ~2.5 days!
Day 1: Get to know the alters, rough sketch of their look + scene
Day 2: Verify the colors, features of the alters and structure of the drawing (because I don’t know how to dress “emo” or how to have olive skin…)
Day 3ish: Final sketch, line work + color!

A little rough with sketching, inking and colored pencils but I had fun drawing this! So nice to get my feet wet in these mediums again. I’m sure everything will look cooler from this day forward! ^_^

Also, I didn’t finish the drawing when I filmed the last scene. I just didn’t want to get dressed again for the camera lol.

AlexMax Han’s Channel

The Video Describing How Their Alters Look Like

Thank you to Jess, Alex, Max, KC, Jade, and Quinn for sharing with us!

Finding My Artist Way Again

Since the last time I posted a video, I wasn’t really quite myself. Here’s what happened and where I am now. (See video below.)

I hit an all time low at the beginning of 2018. I let go of everything I identified with: a convention artist, a teacher of a course, a creator. Everything I thought was me, I let go.

I wasn’t making money, and I wasn’t creating art, having left the convention scene, closed courses, and stopped taking commissions.

Unknowingly, I entered a very deep depression. Voices in my head were telling me I wasn’t good enough, no one cared, separating me from friends, family, and reality. Things spiraled out of control until I picked up a book sitting on my table since the October before, “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron.

Since reading and completing the exercises, things seemed a little clearer, I started seeing myself differently, and I began giving myself permission to create and live more soulfully everyday.

*~* In depth story of my experience that year *~*

It Hurts to Talk About This

*~* Course Mentioned in Video *~*

Artist Alley for Beginners

*~* Book Mentioned in the Video *~*

“The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron:

Julia Cameron’s Website

(Not sponsored nor affiliated with source. Just wanted to show you the link to the book. ^_^)